A Carpenter

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He says you need a carpenter boyfriend

as he inspects my house

He says fix it and sell it

would not be surprised if…

they have not eaten up to the rafters

he gives me a number to call

 

I reply, I need a carpenter boyfriend?

A carpenter comes and I show

him around concerned

about what I have found

and what all needs to be done

the only thing I have

for refuge

he assures me as he sees

the tears well in my eyes

its not quite as bad as it seems

I’m here to put your fears at ease

 

I’m horrified and text my children

and one says burn it down

the other says

will she get sprayed or nailed

so lightly and trivial the words come forth

as I sit and ponder

what is it all worth

the oldest tells the one to be nice

and then the other away from the messages

comes back and says you all need help

 

Do I need a carpenter

and I stop to think

as an atheist friend

comments on a picture

of a man on a cross

 

He was a carpenter from Nazarene

and in the end he was nailed upon a cross

I contemplate the message

whether one believes or not

 

we all need a carpenter

to build our temple

do we not

 

He says to me

I see you’re all heart

just work with me

and I’ll show you how

 

8/4/18

The Framer Builds a House

 

 

Shekinah

shekinah

 

 

Burn it down he says

shall I walk away

and where into the street

shall I stand

like the man

I saw yesterday

on tilt between the lanes

Did not your mother tell you

not to play with fire

 

The tongue it lashes

so quick

when one has nothing to lose

but everything

 

The smoke is thick

it chokes

been on my knees to breathe

my life laid out flat

prostrate

watching redwoods grow in my sleep

 

Burn it down

like a timber falling

into cinder

jumped off that branch

long ago

plunged into heart

this fire

like a seed cracked open

to give rise to new growth

 

Burn it down

make room for hallowed ground

from out of dirt

love springs forth

hollow the heart

to open the eyes of intellect

See through the lies

and into the soul

prana and manna

 

Burn so bright

as one with light

40 years

in the Desert of Sin

Cloud by day

and fire by night

 

Massah and Meribah

the lesson at hand

The Rock and water fall

falter not

a nomad

 

Burn it down

the evilness of heart

8/2/18

 

Presence

 

12-2

Such a drenching

and wringing out

a cathartic exposure

I am not dry

It’s all such a dream

simmering in stew an ingredient

just an additive

to make for a great dining experience

last year it poured

now it passes

into the mix

a baking

consolidating

for the next course…

serve wisdom

for into the dross

sustenance is consumed

and output is energy in speaking holiness

where no vile can taint the innocent

for vileness scorches

singes, and burns

some wield fire to hurt

some to light a flame

…a baptism by fire…

a test of faith

in search of truth

the future is past

when it becomes present

8/2/18

Intention of Purpose

Garden Cross

Is it wrong to wish on a star

or make a wish on a candle

So many mixed messages

the paradox is in the heart

where duality sorts

into one

then to see beyond

and make a wish in all you do

 

Be pure and true

intention of purpose

to experience and chart

it matters to some

lest upon the rocks they dare to dash

some they give

until they give it all away

 

It’s not about right or wrong

it’s about being in the experience

and learning along the way

for that is the way

upon a path

few brave enough to tread

 

so light a candle and make a wish, and say a prayer

for all that matters

is what’s in

your heart

8/1/18

…the way of the cross…

& compass points

mlm54

Predator or Prey

mud dauber

She says don’t be a fool

like a termites nest

where silly laden women

have moth and decay

things that come my way

say be careful you do not destroy

thus my angle turns to a different point of view

there has to be a different way

pause and reflect

take time to figure it out

ethics and choices

we all live by….

a mud dauber’s nest

with larva

and spider

which one are you

for your choices oft

ponder predator, prey, nor either

yet what are they?

For we live by them

and we die by them…

in the beginning and end all

is made of dirt and clay

yet the soul

is void of death…

8/1/18

The End of the Beginning

what you wont say mariska karto
When a man cares not for the child, that is the end of the beginning
for the needs of the child become long forgotten
I wrote you a letter
tried to tell you it’s a man’s undoing
Was it not so a man’s command to be Caretakers?
Bone of my bone if you cannot protect mother and child
You are no man!
Abortion a sin and some cry out….
keeping the heart of the child in mind
So is it a crime
when you advocate for a woman’s right
when the process
you pass to mother
and she alone will have to bear her shame
in her murder you cast her to blame
Caretakers….
Caretakers of what?
The Earth and all its inhabitants….
Sever the child from mother
It is the end of the beginning…..
If a man cannot understand the bond between child and mother…
What could happen?
Lose a Presidency
Lose a wife
Lose a life….
7/1/2018
Spare not the rod…..
Spoil not the man
Break a command,
what will it take to understand

Omens & Superstitions

https://scontent-dfw5-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/34934429_200045213962258_3706382701423493120_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=b2a17db9f324c2fc8f3863148a24f50c&oe=5BA77647

The bird strikes the window
and what do you see
the fires rage the Earth
the quaking and rumbling shall not cease
the forest burns
the animals flee
around me they show me
the signs
I am stricken in my heart
this energy that has drawn me near
it calls to me
and shall I listen
for the pearl
I wonder now
last year
the gift
was it given back to me
my gift rejected
or an affirmation
these questions lurk
for me to answer
the innocent travels with me
and found upon the ground
a miracle
was it to be a gift to another
or a chance to recover
then upon return
the sea had been consumed
my loyal travails
the purging
these signs
I have to ask
does death come for me
time and time again
seeking me
to fail
it seems I cannot go anywhere
without it following me
is that I am to see
now is the time
to forgo
the enchantments cast my way
and be mindful
to not entertain
such notions
to speak of prophecy
or not of omens and superstitions
lest they come and rend me
and all I hold dear
A foreboding and a warning
perchance to turn away
and go not here, or there
to act in stillness
to seek solace
in knowing
all shall be revealed
6/11/2018

By Grace

featherless wings

I’m not an angel
harken not here
I am full of sin
I am not your savior
I can save none
You have a choice
to return to whence you come
My trials have been immense
the travesty encircles me in shame
I try to remove its shackles
daily in countenance
My mercy in my actions
to make for recompense
Come not where I am
save yourself
this misery
there is no pleasure in this plight
other than to know
in time it will all be absolved
one way or another
where my soul shall be will be
if not in the hand of the divine
my hope shall carry me
to not falter in faith
to not waiver in action
and if I do
to fall on my knees
and bow my head and pray
salvation is at hand
this life is but a minute
and before we know it
we will see
the slumber
was a dream
this place a testing ground
to find the truth by choice
not a predetermination of our will
but a chance to return
to that which created us
for if my life has purpose
find the message there within
6/11/2018
My feathers gone away one by one
all alone exposed by grace a gift
we have to find our way back home…

Come Down Here

come down here

I remember you saying come down here
like it was some place other than where I was
Like I did not know what you meant
Like having things defines a man
which is not the truth
for without character
a man is lost
and a woman is wondering in a sea of oblivion
I remember him saying he saw you talking to angels
You remember me reaching out for the sky
Prayers of salvation even in my sleep
Looking for the footprints in the sand to carry me
I wonder now have we fallen
Were we angels in another time
Did I fall first
and what did I do to come down here
for you to follow me
to this time and place
for if our souls are bound
what is our purpose here to be found
A mere fascination with humans
to observe, to seek to feel, to be a witness
to give an account
Come down here
to lift others up
Come down here
to return to love
He says come down here
yet I came first
now follow me home
I give you the lead
for did you not come to rescue me
and am I not here
to share the map
the treasure clicked
upon the light of the soul
no matter the season
the waves of truth carry me
Come down here, he says
I am already here, she says…
together now prostrate
before the King
6/11/2018

Friend or Foe

friend or foe

I’ll admit I had a master
a title to accept or fear…
it was foreboding to say the least
for this Western minded girl being not too sure of Eastern thought and philosophies…
Of course he told me
give me a skeptic any day, they are easier to convince
than those set in their ways of absolutes…
Furthermore he said rarely will a master take on an adult
for they have been too tainted by the corruption of the world
and are much harder to show divine mysteries
for they live in a world of fear…
This struck a resonating chord in me
you see, prior to meeting this teacher from the East
I had done a Bible study for 3 years
where I had grappled with this notion of FEAR…
Now, PRIOR to embarking on the Bible study, I knew to be free and love…
and did not wrap my mind around this notion of anything to FEAR…
Yet, I will admit as soon as this man from a distant land showed up
and told me to have NO FEAR, all of a sudden fears erupted…
It was hard too, because in Romans, I had read about all these actions that lead man astray and it was a bit fearful to contemplate, for all have fallen short, and I had to wonder was there anything to fear in the way I had lived my life…
I admit during the study, I had fears surface, yet reduced it down to there is nothing to fear if one is grounded in love…for that ultimately was the message in 1 John Chapter 4…
I wrote about it, and my writings are a testament to that…
I resolved it to, when one loves, and does no harm to self and others, there is simply nothing to fear…
So, even though I had discovered this on my own, that love and fear cannot coexist….
the words he spoke, he spoke so passionately and boldly about it was almost
like forcing a pill down my throat…
Maybe the medicine I needed at the time to make a connection
to remove my ego!
You know they say when the student is ready the master will show up, so I now wonder if this prior contemplation through Bible studies and processing of spiritual matters may have led to our meeting, for this I do know the 3 year study did foreshadow our meeting,…I say this now, but not back then, as I questioned why me back then? If I were to believe this notion, would this not be a function of my ego, thus I fought him tooth and nail, but I did listen…
For you see he told me there are compass points to live by…
No Fear, No Ego, No Judgments, Love for all people…
Not that we can ever achieve these destinations but they are destinations to strive for…
He said humans are corrupt, and I wrestled with this notion
He said humans need to seek their spiritual nature in their every waking and sleeping thought
He asked me initially as we spoke what the most important thing a human could do was, and I answered him…. it was to think, and he was well pleased with my answer and agreed it was aside from breathing…
He told me when we meet individuals, we internally are gauging if this person before us is a friend or foe, he reduced it down to, “is you my baby, or is you ain’t my baby?”
I was not too sure that was my process…I had to think on that….it sounded somewhat true, yet trivialized by his example, not sure what to think…as I do not think when I meet others, if they are or are not by baby….
Yet, I suppose we do calculate if we can trust or not trust someone to a certain degree just depending on the nature of the interactions…hence perchance there is an inner subconscious working in the mind going on to discern if someone could be a friend or foe…
Furthermore, would it not be wise to figure that out?
4/18/18
Note: I had more on my mind when I wrote this, however I stopped and planned to return to this, but now that I have, I think I shall just leave it as it is for now, other than to say a couple of things.
I know that to accept someone as a master was not something I could readily do, it was too much for me to accept, however the Bible says, you will know a prophet by if their words come true. Over the years, I have seen his words, lessons hold weight, and after all I also came to realize a master is nothing but a teacher, yet so much more. Was I the skeptic who became convinced, not too sure about that, as I walked away from his lessons so many times, only to find later much of what he taught does play out in life. Could it just be the simplicity is there to be found, if we will just open our eyes to it?
Does the world make us numb to seeing simple truths? I know for me, I either was or came to be very opposite of one who gauges if I can trust someone initially. I tend to give trust to others until they show me something in their actions toward me to cause me to remove trust. I think in some respects I have always been like this. I am not sure why?
Of course I might need to cast this notion of me being opposite aside, and contemplate if psychologically what he said is probably more the truth than I realize, as I question if I am deluded in thinking I am not like this because maybe I am at a subconscious level more than likely determining in my relations if those I meet are someone I can trust or not trust to determine at a rudimentary base level of communication and interactions if they are a friend or a foe?
I think even if this is operating at a subconscious level, I tend to observe and listen, and in most cases operate in patience, so who someone is will become manifest over time. Does this mean I am waging an effort to determine friend or foe status…I am still not totally convinced I am…I think in some respects it is a sense of knowing that to give trust to others, eventually who they are will show up, and in that I trust in the process without fear. I think there is a bit of wisdom in trusting others, in order to let them be who they are independent of whether they see me as friend or foe, and independent if I see them that way. I think it is an awareness I have that even in the seemingly lowliest of creatures we can learn something about ourselves, and life. Not that all are lowly in their actions, it is that I tend to not fear if someone is, or not for ultimately their true colors will shine forth as to who they really are.
I do not seek friendships so much, I seek to understand human nature from practically all I meet. I think his mentioning that humans are corrupt was something I found hard at first to understand, but I did come to understand we are spiritual beings living in the flesh, and it does make me realize so many live in the needs of the flesh and often pay little heed to the needs of the spiritual body.
So, in essence I think the question is we may need to ask is, are our actions a friend or a foe to ourselves, our true selves…the divine self within? It is a process to explore, and often I have sought to see the God in everything, and I think when you see the good in others, independent of whether they always act with good intentions; it does help others to turn from hurting themselves and see the good in themselves, at least some individuals who have the capacity to turn away from harming their ultimate goodness they were born with, they may need to return to, before the world shaped them to be a human in flesh.
For I tend to think if we can find the spirit within the flesh, we become a friend to our divine selves, and to others in some ways outside of the constraints of mortal limitations. I think the foe is the burden of our mortal limitations we were born to eradicate…for those wise enough to shed the skin, and its needs, and seek something more outside of the selfish needs of the flesh…especially for those seeking to discover their divine purpose in this life. I think it is trusting in divine grace and wisdom to know even if someone is a foe, that if they are treated kindly by one seeing the good in themselves, no matter if they return the good or deliver evil deeds, that eventually those deeds will be seen for what they are, and then the person has to figure out one day, if they have been a friend or foe of their very own immortal purpose. I think it is the skeptic that has capacity to sort these matters out to find absolutes.
A note of caution: for certainly there are those who are fallen and as such are not your friend. They spread misery, and come as wolves in sheep clothing, let not their misery ensnare you in their pit. I do believe however, if these soul destroyers aim to hurt you, in the end they hurt themselves more, for eventually their deeds will lead them into annihilation of their divine self. Few are brave enough to try to shake these lost souls to awaken, but the truth is sooner or later all will awaken whether it is in this life or the next.
Well, I guess I did write a bit more about this…it is a process unfolding, with many lessons to be learned at every turn, and with every living breath.
4/25/18
Ephesians 6:12
For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.