Rest

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I can’t sleep
I don’t even know you
but I’m missing you
Is it that I wrestle with your demons
or is it that I am turning them out
did they bite me on the lip
bump into my hip
blunt me something pure
not sure what is hidden there
I watch play out
and I allow myself to feel it
not afraid of a little animosity
not that, That is what I want
far from it this unrest
welling in and out of me
like a wave of bliss
a tranquility I think is there
is it just a flight of fancy
wafting over me
taking me into places
unseen
thinking things
that may mean nothing
simply nothing
but I know that is not true
it was a moment of bliss
that will not let me go
but unto it
I toss to and fro
back to rest I need to go
for a long 21 years it has been
to be in the safety of a nest
yet in my father’s blood
I have always been
but to the winds
he’s seen me flail
in and out of heart it seems
yet always in the palm of his hand
I cannot live with this invisibility
I must step from its shadows
to recapture simplicity
the depths of the complexities
I have walked every avenue
and now
I shall leave these streets
and find myself
back on the ground
yet always mindful
it is not for frivolities
for something sacred and true
the lessons not unlearned
no matter the cost
all is not lost
the past is not my future
my grace
is the smile upon my face
to find
I’ll weave this tale soon to a close
and let new horizons take their place
with every gift you’ve given me
I have to give
to rest this legacy
12/13/2017
buried in this chest…

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