Today looking in the mirror, the seductive eye staring back at evil at me

I realized the flesh will never protect the spirit for it always looks after the flesh

When you think you can save yourself from the choices of the flesh

Always will the flesh fail…

Such an awesome awareness, of the tricks the mortal mind plays on the spiritual self

To think I could go into the Lion’s den and come out clean

I now wear the marks of my fight

Out of this raging river I must emerge

For the time is at hand for me to listen to my spirit guide

And resist all temptation to heed my mortal self

The carnal is so intoxicating

When will the embracing of this death be complete

Today I want to be born to till the soil

I pray I can get it right this time

For I must save myself

And stop trying to save others

When all I am doing is bringing them down

By the weight of my own travesties

Such a fool I have been

To think this has all been done in innocence

Just like Eve told what to do

She did things her way

And now her shame is upon me as I have done the same

This war inside me is insane

For it is hard to know for sure what God wants me to do

I always struggle with the truth

When it comes to me, I question my mind thinking I am blind

To believe God is speaking to me

Yet he keeps knocking, and my ears open

And then I question the source

Please my Lord, teach me to trust in all you wish me to do

Please my Lord, bridle my spirit to never question truth again

Please my Lord direct my hand, direct my speech, direct my manner

Please my Lord, I no longer wish to be bound by sin

I beg for liberation, I beg for strength, I beg your forgiveness

And I praise your forbearance with me, for I know you love me

As I love you, and your grace is countless and mercy beyond comprehension

Set me straight, I pray to go and sin no more.

 

1-2-03 (4:35 EDT) Today, I pulled the Rune of Self